时间:2022-12-08 22:50 所属分类:写作指导 点击次数:
在SCI论文修改的阶段,很多作者会对自己的文章感到厌烦,想尽快把它投出去。尤其是对于英文论文来说,很多作者可能不愿意花费时间做逐字逐句地修改诸如“who”还是“whom”,“that”还是“which”这样细小的语法问题。因此,为解决英文论文修改效率问题,美国普林斯顿大学温迪·劳拉·贝尔彻在其著作《学术期刊论文写作必修课》中提出了一种新的英文论文诊断检测法——贝氏诊断检测法,帮助作者发现自己的论文在什么地方需要改进,并给出简单的解决方法,从而让论文修改工作看起来不会那么吓人。
一、论文需要删掉的词
很多写不好的学术论文都与列表项有关。列表项是利用几个连接词串联起来的若干内容项。列表项提示了句子中可能出现的多余的词。如果句子可以不用这些词,那就不要用。
1.寻找and和or。这两个连词都出现在一个句子里,意味着有可能存在重复用词(用一个词能表达,却用了两个词)。改进重复用词的句子,需要去掉标志词和其中一个同义词。
重复用词:Yang and Yu argued that emotion is necessary and essential.
删减后:Yang and Yu argued that emotion is necessary.(necessary和essential是重复用词,两者保留其一即可)
2.寻找there和it。这两个代词标明句子中存在着多余成分或表达不够有力的动词。尤其是和to be,that,which同时出现的时候,要特别注意。在修改由这些标志词群构成的句子时,需要删掉这些标志词,删掉to be,使用表达力更强的动词,然后把主语提到句子前部。
混乱版:There were a great number of test tubes lying on the counter.
修改后:A number of test tubes lay on the counter.
最佳版本:Test tubes covered the counter.
3.寻找that,which,who。这些关系代词经常会标志多余成分,尤其在它们和to be,there,it同时出现的时候。当这些词一起出现时,通常可以直接删除,把句子后面出现的名词改写为前面的修饰词,或者改为一个动词,但是需要注意的是,that或which有时候也是表明句子含义的重要成分。
烦琐的表达:His fundamental belief is that there is a conflict between Sartre’s philosophy and his ethics.
简洁的表达:He believes that Sartre’s philosophy conflicts with his ethics.
4.寻找介词by,of,to,for,toward,on,at,from,in,with,as。这些介词出现在从句中的时候通常会标志不必要的短语。可以去掉这些短语,或者把名词改写为修饰词。
烦琐的表达:With reference to democracy,we should encourage it by way of a free press.
简洁的表达:We should encourage democracy with a free press.
二、论文需要添加的词
修改有时候意味着添加几个词,而不是删除。尤其是对于代词来说,代词的作用是用来代替一个名词。有时代词指代的名词并不清楚,脱离它们指代的先行词,读者想弄清楚其含义,不得不反复品读句子,因此学术写作中要尽量修改或删除代词,将代词替换成一个具体的名词或添加一个名词。
1.寻找this,these,those。这些指示代词经常单独出现,却含义不明。检查每一个关系代词,考虑在其后增加一个名词作为先行词。代词离它的名词越远,越需要给它加一个名词,使其含义明确。
含义不明的代词:These caused the problem.
清晰的名词:These manufacturers caused the problem.
2.寻找they,them,their,its。这些代词(包括it)容易离它们正确的先行词太远,离错误的先行词又太近。检查每一个代词,使用名词替换掉代词。其他需要注意的代词还有she/her/hers,he/him/his,we/us/ours。
含义不明的代词:It was not always efficacious for all the patients,they told them.
清晰的名词:The drug was not always efficacious for all the patients,the researchers told the company.
最佳句子:The drug did not help all the patients,the researchers told the company.
三、论文需要替换的词
论文有时候不能删掉或添加,而是需要替换掉一些词。也就是说,需要使用一些表达力更强的词。特别是学术性写作倾向于使用动词的名词化结构,或者使用模棱两可的动词,来代替生动形象的动词。
1.寻找be动词的各种形式,包括is,are,was,were,am,be,being,been。就像常见到的那样,be动词可是英语动词中的主力词。它对于进行时态非常重要,也是重要的连系动词,还能构成被动语态。Be动词在英语写作中随处可见。需要注意的是,你是否能找到其他比be动词更富有表现力的动词或句子结构。有很多生动的动词可以用来替换be动词。
表现力弱的动词:Mohammed is a mountain climber and the designer of hiking boots.
表现力强的动词:Mohammed climbs mountain and designs hiking boots.
2.寻找动词have,had和has的各种形式。动词have对构成有效的时态非常重要(例如,they have waited,they will have waited)。但是have有时会将其他动词名词化,特别是与冠词a或an搭配使用的时候。
名词化的动词:The candidates have a tendency to exaggerate their accomplishments,which is indicative of their insecurity.
去名词化的动词:The candidates tend to exaggerate their accomplishments,indicating their insecurity.
加强的句子:The candidates’insecurity leads them to exaggerate their accomplishments.
3.寻找动词do,does和did的各种形式。动词do是构成行为问句的关键要素(例如,do you intend to go?)。但是to do形式在和a,an,not连用的时候,会使动词名词化。请删除句子中的这些成分后再改写句子。
名词化的动词:We would like to do a study on animal husbandry.
去名词化的动词:We would like to study animal husbandry.
4.寻找动词make,provide,perform,get,seem和serve的各种形式。这些动词会掩盖表达力强的动词,特别是与冠词a,an和介词搭配使用时。请用表达力更强的动词来改写句子。
较弱的表达:This course will provide an introduction to animal husbandry to undergraduates.
较强的表达:This course will introduce undergraduates to animal husbandry.
5.寻找以-ent/-ence/-ion/-ize结尾的词。这些词尾通常表明了被名词化的动词,尤其是与介词搭配使用时。检查文本,改写句子,尽量把名词转化为动词。
名词化的动词:The state’s improvement was due to the establishment of an impartial judiciary.
去名词化的动词:The state’s improvement was due to establishing an impartial judiciary.
去名词化的多个动词:The state improved upon establishing an impartial judiciary.
6.寻找not。Not标志着表达无力的名词、形容词或者多重否定的问题。检查文中每处not的使用,在改写句子时删掉它。
多重否定:Not only does Bosey’s novel not have a well-defined plot,but it also does not have strong character development or interesting writing.
修改后(仍然表达无力的形容词):Bosey’s novel does not have a well-defined plot,strong character development or interesting writing.
最佳句子:A murky plot,poor character development,and uninteresting writing mar Bosey’s novel.
7.寻找very。这个词常会导致写作结构混乱,动词表达无力。尽量不用very,重新修改句子。
混乱的表达:They were very tired.
修改后:They were exhausted.
最佳版本:The project participants were exhausted.
8.寻找以-ly结尾的词。这些以-ly结尾的词通常标志着其自身表达力弱,或者有表达力弱的动词。尽量不使用这些词。
表达无力的形容词:They absolutely believed that Epifania would very successfully complete her project.
有力的表达:They were confident that Epifania would complete her project.
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